Marriages can be a whole lot of fun but then the kids come along.
Sometimes a marriage can quickly become all about the kids and it takes some of the happiness and fun out of it. You find it more difficult to spend time together and you barely ever get any alone time any more.
Here’s how to maintain a happy and healthy marriage with children.
Put Each Other Before the Kids
When you’re putting together a healthy marriage you need to focus on your partner more than you focus on your kids.
You’re a husband before a father, or a wife before a mother. The marriage forms the backbone of the relationship and you need everyone to be able to see and feel it. Let your kids see how much you love each other and show your partner that they are still special to you.
It also makes your kids feel more secure.
Don’t Interfere With your Partner’s Parenting
You and your partner will have a different role in your child’s life.
- Mothers are typically the nurturers. They make children eat their vegetables and kiss their scrapes away.
- Dads tend to be the fun and cool ones. Dad lets kids eat what they want when they want and just mess around.
While you might feel that your approach is better you should let your partner do things their way for a balanced upbringing.
To follow on from not interfering you also need to present a united front. You should support your partner and their decisions.
If your kids try and say that your partner let them do something you should resist the urge to say that you say they can’t, which is probably going to be difficult. Being a consistent united front shows your strength to your kids and lets them know that they can’t get away with something and say they were told it was okay by your partner.
Staying active helps keep you and your relationship healthy. It also shows off some positive behavior to your kids. You can make it a family affair by going on walks or bike rides together as a family.
That further reinforces the positive behavior with your kids and gets them excited about exercise. No matter what it is you do make sure you do something and enjoy the endorphins that come with it.
When you think about it it’s almost ironic that a child would disrupt the very process that brought them into the world. Having a kid can really destroy a sex life but there’s no reason to let it. You need to make sex a priority again and find time for one another.
Sex and physical intimacy are what is holding your marriage together (plus it’s fun!) so make it a part of your marriage; even if you have to lock the bedroom door.
Kids can quickly become a major part of any marriage, but you still need to find time for each other and spend time together as a couple. Your partner, and indeed your marriage, will thank you for it.